Anti-Mikroschrott Fun: Quotation: General Motors

 

Fun
+Jokes
+Games
+Media
+Programs
+Nuke
+Quotation
++Contra
++Pro
++GM
++Britannica
Downloads
Products
Company
Persons
Misc

deutsch    english
Startside -> Fun -> Quotation -> GM  

General Motors

Bill Gates compared the computer industry on a computer fair with the automobile industry. He said: "If General Motors would have keptup in such a way with the technology like the computer industry, then we would drive today all 25-Dollar-cars, would drive the 1000 miles per gallon sprit."

Later General Motors declared on a press release:
"If General Motors have developed a technology such as Microsoft, then we would drive all cars with the following characteristics today:

  • Their cars would have an accident without recognizable reason twice on the day.

  • Each time, if the lines on the road would again be drawn, everyone would have to buy a new car.

  • Occasionally an car go out without recognizable reason on the motorway and everyone easily would accept to start it new and then would drive on.

  • If one executed certain maneuvers, the car would go out easily and would refuse to start again. One would have to then install the engine again.

  • One can sit only alone in the cars, it is, one buys "Car98" or "CarNT". But then one would have to pay each seat individually.

  • Apple would manufacture cars, which drives with solar power, reliably to run, five times so fast and twice so easily to drive is, but they run only on five per cent of the roads.

  • The oil control light, which flares for the temperature and battery replaced by a "general car Error" flare.

  • New seats would require that all have the same size.

  • The Airbag system would ask "Are you sure?", before it releases.

  • General Motors would force you to along-buy to go with each car a luxury card record of the company Rand McNally (since newest adaughter of GM) even if you did not need or wanted this card record. If you did not assume this option, the car wouldbecome slower immediately 50 per cent (or more badly). Beyond that General Motors became therefore inevitably a target of investigations of the law.

  • Always then, if a new car would be presented by GM, all drivers would have to again learn driving a car, because none would function the control lever exactly the same as in the old car.

  • One would have to press the "Start" button, in order to switch theengine off.

  • © 1997 - 2012 Dieter Gerth